If you give a 6 year old...

So do you know that book? The one that's titled, "If you give a mouse a cookie"? If you do, then you know my current life inside and out. If you don't, well then I'll tell you - it's kind of like this: (if you replace the mouse with a 6 year old girl)

If you give a 6 year old a choice, she's going to choose the one you didn't want her to choose.
So say it's between having her breakfast in bed or downstairs. She'll choose in bed, every time.

If she eats it in bed, she'll want to watch a video while she eats. She'll pick one and then change her mind as soon as you've put it in. It's best to tell her she must watch whatever one she chooses, so she best choose carefully the first time!

If you put in a video, she'll want to watch the whole thing AND draw while she watches. So you must get out blank white paper and markers so she can color away.

If she's like most 6 year olds, her attention span will not be long. So about half way through the film, she'll decide she wants to play house AND keep watching the film. So you play house, and you're ALWAYS the mom or the dog.

When the movie finishes, she'll probably want to keep playing. But this time, she wants her dolls to have houses and beds. She'll ask YOU to make them for her. And because it's fun, you'll make a house with red walls, a pink roof and a green door. It will have yellow trimming and grass growing around it. She'll want the beds to match, so you make one of every color.

Now it's lunch time, and she'll want something you've never made before. So you must go down to the kitchen, and not be long, and make whatever it is that she wanted. You end up asking the cook to help.

Again, while she eats, she'll want to watch ANOTHER video. You put ANOTHER video in and watch the WHOLE thing. Again, she'll get anxious and want to draw again, but this time - on your hands. By the end of the movie, you have flower doodles all over you paws and paper chips in your hair. She's still running around you while you try and scrub them all off - which they never do!

Finally, after you chase her around the room, she gets a bath. But in the bath she'll want you to read to her. So you'll read her almost three books before her 30 minutes are up, and then take on the task of drying her two and a half feet long golden locks.

While you're drying her head she'll want to sing and maybe cut up some shimmery pompoms so she can use them as confetti in her next game which is shower time! You lay on the bed and she showers you in little shimmery pieces of chopped up bows. It takes you another half hour just to clean them all up.

Lsatly, you send her off to supper which is hopefully followed by TV time with her mom and dad, which is then hopefully followed by bedtime and two books.

You'll go to bed after her, flop on your pillows and close your eyes for a minute only to find the next day has come, and you get to do it ALL over again. THE END.


Typing this, and knowing that I was once a six year old like this, too, makes me want to write a special thank you to my own mom and dad: THANK YOU FOR NOT SELLING ME SO YOU COULD HAVE FREE TIME! IT TRULY IS GREATLY APPRECIATED!

I on the other hand, may sell this girl back to her family. There's only so much tinsel in your face, ears and arm pits that one can take!